It’s a British miniseries with a bunch of gossipy mid-older-aged women and a cow in pajamas (at least temporarily). It’s…soothing. I need to be soothed.
The beekeeping course at the CBG was fan-damn-tastic. I should have just ended my day with a leisurely stroll around the gardens (not much growing at the moment) and a meander through Whole Foods. Instead…well, I raced downtown (I hate driving in the city) in traffic (I hate traffic), to meet a friend of mine for some photos of the Luminous Field (a light show that they’re doing in Millennium Park in front of the “Bean” (or behind, depending on where you’re standing)) – which ends on Monday, I think. Everything about that experience is making me cranky. If I rant about it, I’ll only spread my frustration and negativity around. Suffice to say that it was NOT worth driving an hour and then paying $24 to park for the 45 minutes of irritation that ensued. I hate you all, people. Go HOME and don’t come back. I screamed so much in my car on the way back that my throat hurts.
More about bees later. Because I’m going to quit my job and tend them. And if I starve, FINE. It’s worth it.
Wait, so the thing you didn’t go to was a different thing? I am confused. But I squish you anyway. I have done some car screaming so I know how that is. Cars are a good place for that.
Bees! Bumbly bumbly bees! They greet you with a Buzz!, and they leave you with a Sting!
They don’t sting so much…well, maybe a bit. I suppose as a bee KEEPER I will have to accustom myself to being stung occasionally. I must maintain a calm air around my bees. I like the idea of keeping bees. They will be kept. My bees. I will keep them well.
Bees are usually fairly chill unless they feel threatened, in my experience.
Of course, it’s possible that messing with their hives will make them feel threatened, at least until they get used to your presence, pig.
Do the beekeeping books have advice on acclimating bees to one’s presence? Masking scents, perhaps?
They do have things to say about this. There are smokers that you use to mask your scent and calm the bees (it makes them retreat lower into the hive, too, so if you’re inspecting an upper box, you can send them below). The smokers use a little bellows to puff the smoke (this may be one of the perks of beekeeping).
Also, if you *do* get stung, they recommend removing the stinger right away and blowing smoke over the sting, because the act of stinging (or maybe the body parts left all over you when you’re stung) produces a pheromone that attracts more guarding bees and they will also try to sting you.
You’re supposed to wear light colored clothing (because dark colors are predator colors) when you work your bees, and they recommend working the hives (examining them) when most of the bees are out foraging (so between noon and 3pm) – makes sense! They have beekeeping suits to help keep the bees away from you, but the more experienced beekeepers just move calmly and are gentle with their bees – brushing them off of frames instead of waving their arms around wildly – and don’t seem to wear more than long pants and a veil (the hat and head protector thingie).
Our instructor said not to work bees at night. They’ll all be in the hive, but instead of flying around you, they’ll CRAWL all over you. Which gives most people the heebie jeebies. Ha!
Oh, it was such a good class! *glee*
Yes. Do not be that old woman who was stung once and then mobbed by the entire swarm and stung hundreds of times and almost died and was in a coma but when she woke up her arthritis was cured…. unless your arthritis gets really bad.
I have experience being calm around bees, and I can report that it almost always works. Wasps, on the other hand, are assholes and will attack without provocation.
I will avoid hiving wasps. They are cranky. Also, no honey.